


Leading With Your Heart

by WaaywardDaughter



Series: A Wardens Heart [1]
Category: Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Origins
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Canon-Typical Violence, F/M, Fluff, Smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-23
Updated: 2020-08-24
Packaged: 2021-03-04 19:15:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 6
Words: 20,771
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25421515
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WaaywardDaughter/pseuds/WaaywardDaughter
Summary: Elise Amell has always tried to do what was right. But once she is conscripted into the Wardens after following her First Enchanters orders, right becomes harder to find. Her heart pulls her one way but her head pulls her another way. Will she be able to come to a healthy balance? Or will she favor one over all?*** Story will be updated every Thursday, with some spontaneous chapters here and there when I get too excited to wait!
Relationships: Alistair/Female Amell (Dragon Age), Alistair/Female Warden (Dragon Age), Male Cousland/Morrigan (Dragon Age), Morrigan/Male Warden (Dragon Age)
Series: A Wardens Heart [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1841329
Comments: 2
Kudos: 8





	1. Chapter 1

The room was eerily quiet. Not that it was uncommon for being late at night; everyone else was asleep. That is except for Elise. Her eighteenth birthday had come and gone and today would be the day of her Harrowing. Happy birthday right? No one was allowed to know what the Harrowing entailed. She knew not everyone made it back though. Having grown up in the Circle since she was eight, she knew on more than one occasion where one of the older apprentices would go in and not come out.

She laid in bed, twisting her hair around her finger. The color would change, turning a mean shade of purple, then she would unravel it and start over. It helped take her mind off what was to come. Whatever that was. Metal footsteps grew closer and she sat herself up. It was time. She laid in bed for a few more minutes, listening as the rhythmic footfalls grew closer. _Thud, thud, thud._ Whoever it was, they were extremely heavy-footed, their steps echoing throughout the halls rather unnecessarily. Then the knock came on her door. Though she expected it, it still scared her. 

Elise jumped off the bed and quickly opened the door. The templar standing there wasn't as mean-looking, Ser Milton, she thought his name was. He hadn't been there long, and she couldn't remember his name for the life of her.

"It is time for your Harrowing," he said softly. His grey eyes sparkled as he gazed at her, showings kindness most the templars here did not share. She nodded to him and they did the slow climb to the chamber.

"Who decided the Circle should be in a Tower," she huffed to herself as they reached the final set of stairs. The templar chuckled and shook his head but didn't give a reply. They were expected to keep a certain distance from their charges, yet sometimes they would converse. There was one that she played chess with sometimes in the library if she could convince him.

They reached the chamber and the butterflies returned to her stomach. This was it. The life or death moment of her... well life. She stood in the middle of the room, before the First Enchanter and the Knight-Commander of Kinloch Hold.

"'Magic exists to serve man, and never rule over him," the Knight-Commander said as he stepped forward. Elise had grown familiar with the chant over the years. It was only hammered into their heads about three times a week.

"Your magic is a gift, but it is also a curse, for demons in the Fade are drawn to you, and seek to use you as a gateway into this world." Nothing she didn't already know. It was one of her biggest fears. That, and spiders. Creepy crawly bugs hiding in all the places you need to go, just waiting to jump out at you.

Elise listened as the First Enchanter explained the Harrowing to her, trying to force her nerves down. She briefly met the gaze of the amber eyes templar, Cullen was his name, in the room and watched as he flushed a pale shade of pink. He did that quite often when she was around and she had to bite her cheek to keep from smiling and giggling at him.

"Are you ready child?"

She blinked and took a deep breath, folding her hands in front of her. "Not really," she whispered and it was the truth. She was terrified; she wasn't strong enough yet. The First Enchanter must have sensed it and gave her a small yet encouraging smile. 

"I have faith you will succeed Elise." She nodded and the Knight-Commander cleared his throat, directing her attention to him now.

"Know this apprentice: should you fail, we templars will do our duty. You will die." Her stomach dropped. Of course they would. It wasn't news to her, yet hearing it was different. It was as if her future was already set in stone. She nodded and inhaled deeply.

"Keep your wits about you," the First Enchanter said, "The spirits may rule it but your own will is real."

The Knight-Commander huffed impatiently and crossed his arms. "She must do it alone, First Enchanter." Then he turned to Elise. "You are ready."

 _Well thanks for asking, because I'm most certainly not._ The First Enchanter handed her a potion bottle, the light blue liquid singing softly. Inhaling, she tipped the bottle back and swallowed the drink.

~~~

Elise groaned as she rolled over. Who knew the ground was so hard to sleep on? She sat up slowly and looked around. Nothing familiar to her yet. She stood up and walked around, following the path that was oddly set up for her. A bright ball of energy instantly attacked as she turned the corner, barely giving herself any time to throw up a weak barrier to block it. In return, she sent an _arcane bolt_ towards it. The creature faded away instantly and she let out a yell of excitement. "Maybe this won't be so bad?"

She ran up the hill and followed the path, following the same dance with the wisp at the top of the hill. Giddiness filled her chest as she ran up it, a smirk on her face. She would finish her Harrowing in record time, go to her new room, and sleep all night. She continued down the path, quickly disposing of the wisps that hung around. She was still looking around, curious about this place. Granted, she went to the Fade every night, but it wasn't anything like this.

"Someone else thrown to the wolves. Fresh and unprepared as ever." Elise froze and glanced around, panicked at the sudden voice. The voice turned angry as she looked down at the mouse at her feet. "It isn't right that they do this, the templars. Not to me, not to you, not to anyone."

She couldn't hide her smile and crossed her arms, cocking her hip out to the side. "You're a talking rat. What would you know of what the templars do?"

"You think you are really here? In that body? You look like _that_ because you think you do!"

"Well I certainly hope I do, considering I happen to enjoy how my body looks."

A bright light flashed in her eyes and she quickly raised her arms to shield herself as the mouse became... well a human. He really had the nerve to talk about how her body looked when he was running around as a mouse? The gall! She wasted no time telling him so as well.

"Like I said, in this place, you are what you perceive yourself to be."

"And you perceive yourself as... a mouse?"

"Well, I think I used to be like you, before."

"Before?" That was a confusing way to end a sentence.

"They kill you if you take too long. The templars that is. They assume you failed so they kill you to prevent something from getting out. That's what I happened to me, I think. And you don't have much time either before you wind up the same."

Elise felt her stomach plummet. She had been rushing through it but just how much time had passed in the waking world? If that was a risk, she needed to stop talking to this mouseman and deal with whatever awaited her.

"So what do I need to do? If I am on a tight schedule, I can't waste time talking to you."

"There's a demon here, contained just for you. You need to find it and resist it, if you can."

She opened her mouth to argue with him. What did he mean by that? He barely knew her, so he just assumed she would fall into the clutches of some creature of the Fade?

"I'll follow you if that's alright. There are other spirits here who could help as well."

Elise just shrugged and started down the path again. Part of her was growing wary of the mouse that followed her. What if he was a demon? She would just have to keep her mind sharp and wits about her, just like her First Enchanter said. The pair wandered down the path, trying to keep an eye out for any demons or spirits. The glowing ball of light that was growing familiar floated in front of her and she once again dismissed it with two well-aimed _arcane bolts_.

As they turned the corner, she saw the figure of a ghosty looking templar. The mouse mentioned something about him being another spirit so she cautiously approached him. He seemed to notice her immediately.

"Another mortal thrown into the flames and left to burn I see." He went on to call the mages that's he called family cowardly, saying they would be better fighting against each other than to send one unarmed to fight a demon.

"We can't know if we are strong enough to resist a demon if we fight each other," she said dryly and crossed her arms. "How do you even know why I am here?"

"You are not the first to arrive here and you won't be the last. I wish you luck on your future battles, mage."

She looked behind him at the weapon racks. There was a stave there, similar to what she used when training. They sent her into the Fade without a weapon but were there rules about using weapons _already_ in the Fade? If there was, no one told her and she really didn't have time to stand around and debate it.

"Alright, let's do this," she said with a firmness she didn't think she had in her voice. The man readied his weapon and the duel began. 

She readied a _flame blast_ and sent it soaring towards him. It just bounced off him as he charged towards her, swinging his longsword. Elise let out a squeal and threw up a barrier, reflecting the man's attack and giving her time to step away. This time she sent forth the _arcane bolt_ she was getting used to slinging and it caused him to take a step back. Smirking, the girl readied another and shot it forward. The man took another step and before charging her. This time she didn't get her barrier up and he knocked her to the ground with his shield.

All air had left her and she saw stars dancing in her eyes before she regained herself and quickly stood back up. This battle needed to end before she ended up with a blade in her gut. In either world. She readied another bolt and launched it but he blocked it with his shield then prepared to charge her again.

She was ready. Elise quickly rolled out of the way and hit the man with another two _arcane bolts_ to his back. Her body was thrumming as her lyrium reserve was getting lower. Thankfully the spirit called for an end to the duel, declaring her the winner, allowing her to take the staff. She took it and placed it on her back, suddenly feeling more confident than she had after speaking to the creepy mouse guy.

They continued down the path, leaving the spirit of valor behind to do whatever it is spirits do in this world. Now instead of wisps, she had spirit wolves attacking her. _Great._ She used her _flame blast_ and the ghostly canines soon fell like everything else. She was growing more tired, her body not used to the amount of magic being used. 

They turned the corner on the path and she saw a bear. Not a ghostly looking one either. Elise's heart raced as she looked at the creature, lazing in front of her. _This must be my demon._

"I don't like this one. We should go," Mouse whispered and she nodded in agreement. A cold chill slid down her spine as she thought about the templars, poised over her body. Waiting. Counting down the time.

She realized the bear that had spikes growing out of it was still talking to her. He was a demon, a Sloth demon he said, and it matched him. He yawned, and though he brought up the opportunity to possess her, he was too _lazy_ to do it. _Must be my lucky day._

"He could be very powerful... His form I mean," Mouse said softly. Elise turned and glared at him.

"He is a _demon._ I want no part of him teaching me anything. Let's just go find the one that's hunting me and leave." She paused as she turned away then looked at Mouse. "You seem to be hindering me more than I like. I would like you to stop." Mouse immediately began his protest as she started back up the path. The bear said he wasn't the one hunting her. So who was? She could barely think as the man behind her pleaded with her to change her mind. 

"Look _Mouse,"_ she said impatiently. "All I care about is getting back to my home. If you think it's so important to learn, go back and ask the demon to teach you. I refuse to be tempted by anything and right now. You said so yourself- you didn't like the looks of him."

She started to turn back around but four spirit wolves quickly surrounded them. Elise pulled her staff off and began firing at the wolves. She hit one with an _arcane bolt_ while another got burned by her _flame blast_. In between letting those recharge she was shooting the wolves with balls of frost from the staff or swinging her staff to try and hit them. Then she began the pattern all over again. Bolt, flame, staff. Bolt, flame, staff. 

Despite being worn out, the battle went smoothly and she continued up the bath with a smirk. She could do this. She would be going home soon. She-

"And so it comes to me at last." 

Elise blinked out of her thoughts. An orange and red demon sat in front of her in the clearing, fire rising from the edges. It looked like lava that had taken on a form. _Rage demon,_ she remembered. Fire spells would do her no good here. She listened as it didn't even try to convince her, just immediately assumed she would agree to it taking over her body. Cocky shit.

"It's you against us two. I think we have the advantage here," she said threateningly and pulled her staff out. The demon laughed loudly and the man beside her began to shuffle uneasily.

"Did you not tell her of our agreement Mouse?"

Elise looked at him with wide, panicked eyes. This is precisely what the First Enchanter warned her about. Yet she still fell for it.

"There is no agreement! Not anymore!" She watched as the man argued with the demon about whatever agreement they had. Time was ticking. She didn't have time for this. The lyrium in her veins hummed as she tossed an _arcane bolt_ at the demon, catching it by surprise. It roared in anger, spraying flames at her. Luckily forming barriers was coming easier to her now and the shimmering blue shield protected her from the heat as she used her staff to shoot more frost shots at the demon.

The battle raged on, the mouse standing in the corner watching, hiding. Only once did the rage demon land a hit on her, the hot claws tearing her robes and burning her skin. With a roar, she sent another blast from her staff followed by an _arcane bolt_ and the demon screamed in agony as it writhed on the ground before perishing.

Elise leaned on her staff and huffed, a weary chuckle escaping her.

"You did it! You actually did it!"

She turned to the man who looked at her with surprise. Her staff was pointed at him and she remained in an offensive stance. 

"You tried to set me up," she yelled. The betrayal weighed on her, the first time in her life she didn't trust someone. He looked almost apologetic.

"I... did yes. But after what I saw when you fought valor, then your determination to not deal with the sloth demon? It made me believe in you, that you were a true mage." He sighed and clasped his hands in front of him. "I regret my part in it, but you showed me you can be more, that there is hope."

"There is no hope for you Mouse," she whispered and her voice was full of sympathy. "You are dead, trapped here forever."

The man chuckled and shrugged. "Not necessarily. There is a way for me to leave, you know. You just have to let me in."

She frowned. Suddenly the rage demon didn't seem like her test. "What do you mean _let you in_?" Though she already suspected what he wanted.

The man glared at her and suddenly sounded angry. "Help me back! They killed me, just as they have others. Just as they will you too!"

Elise shook her head and took a step back, keeping her staff aimed at him. "Absolutely not. I will make it back in time. I will not die here."

"Can't you feel the sword at your neck? You are everything they fear, magic, the Fade, _everything._ Once you are here, your fate is already decided."

"I refuse to believe that."

The man chuckled and shook his head. "Maybe they are right about you." Mouse voice changed, deeper and more... demonic. She watched as he continued talking and grew into a pride demon. She didn't have enough in her to fight another demon, especially one as strong as _pride_. Her heart began racing as the panic in her soul started becoming more real.

Then he was gone and her vision turned dark.


	2. Chapter 2

."Elise, wake up. Say something please!?"

"Mmm, five more minutes..."

"Oh, thank the Maker. Wake up!"

Elise groaned and rolled over to look at the man who was standing over her bunk. Sleep pulled at her as she tried to focus on him.

"Jowan, what are you doing here?"

"I wanted to make sure you were okay. They brought you up this morning, didn't realize you had been out all night."

She chuckled and slowly sat up, her side where the demon swiped her still sore. 

"What was it like? I heard some apprentices never come back from the Harrowing."

Elise shrugged and rubbed her face, the demons voice and Mouses betrayal still weighing on her mind. The Harrowing was a secret for a reason, First Enchanter had told her as much. "It was... an experience all of its own."

"Come _on,_ Elise. We are friends, and I don't want to go in unprepared! Just a little hint."

She shook her head and gave him a sympathetic gaze. "I'm sorry, but I can't say anything. You will experience it soon enough."

He scoffed and turned his back to her. "Whenever that will be. You get to move to the nice quarters while I am stuck here, waiting. I've been here longer than you, and yet, they still haven't tested me yet. It's like they don't want to!" She sighed and put a gentle hand on his shoulder. 

"Now now, I am sure you will be taking it any day now, and once you get moved, we will go raiding the pantry. Just for old times sake."

He shrugged and gave her a small smile. "I don't know why I am bothering you with this. Irving wanted to see you as soon as you awoke." Elise grinned and hugged the apprentice before lightly punching his arm.

"I'm your friend Jowan. You can always come to me if you need anything."

He nodded and chuckled before walking off. She started down the hall to head to Irving's office. The rooms were noisier now, the sounds of people chatting with their friends filling them. Other than Jowan, she didn't have any other friends here. It was easier to keep to herself, choosing to study in the library during the evenings when most had already gone to bed. That way, she wouldn't be bothered. She was growing tired of walking and decided she would stop for a break. Luckily a familiar blonde man stood in the hall, and her heart quickened at the sight of him.

"Hello Cullen," she whispered and bowed her head respectfully. The man immediately blushed and rubbed the back of his neck, something she noticed he did a lot when she was around. 

"H-Hello. I- um, am glad to see your Harrowing went smoothly," he managed out and she giggled and brushed one of her orange strands behind her ear. "T-They made watch over your... Harrowing. To... To strike you down if you became an abomination. N-Nothing personal I swear."

Elise giggled, put her hands behind her back, and looked at the blushing mess of a templar in front of her. "I take no offense Cullen. It is your job. I am glad to see you take it so seriously."

"Yes well um... I would have felt terrible about it. But I am glad to see you are alright," he whispered and his eyes softened. She grinned and leaned up to plant a kiss on his cheek, watching him turn redder than the skirt on his armor.

"Shall we meet in our usual spot tonight," she whispered and he looked around quickly before nodding. Elise grinned and stepped back clearing her throat. "I should get going. Irving is expecting me apparently. Thank you for keeping me company Ser Cullen."

He nodded, the blush on his face still bright as ever. "You are welcome Elise."

She continued down the hall, aware of the burning gaze on her back. Their almost nightly rendezvous' were one of her favorite things in the Circle. It made her feel normal for once like she wasn't a mage. Just a normal girl with her crush. Or boyfriend? She wasn't sure. They shouldn't be fooling around anyway. It was easier not to add titles. Yet she couldn't help but feel an ache whenever he wasn't around.

Irving's office grew closer and she heard the sounds of a man arguing with the First Enchanter and the Knight-Commander. She gently rapped on the open door and everyone's attention turned to her.

"You asked for me First Enchanter," she stated softly and kept her hands firmly clasped behind her back. A chill settled over her and it took every ounce of her being to not tremble under the men's gazes. A man stood in the back, his tanned skin and dark-colored hair standing out against the gray of the men beside him.

"Ahh, our newest sister of the Circle. Come in child," Irving said and she carefully stepped into the room. No one seemed angry nor could she remember if she had done something wrong before the Harrowing. Unless that was the reason she had been called here.

"Is this...?" The man stepped up and looked her over as if he were sizing her up. The Knight-Commander excused himself, sounding slightly annoyed with her sudden arrival. Irving nodded at her.

"Yes, this is Elise Amell. Elise, this is Duncan, of the Grey Wardens." 

Elise bowed her head respectfully and smiled. "It is a pleasure to meet you Duncan."

"You've heard of the war brewing in the south I expect," Irving said. She nodded. Her teacher Wynne plus several other Senior Enchanters, had left to assist the king's army. It wasn't just any battle though. There had been whispers that it was a darkspawn horde. Shortly after the mages had left for Ostagar, she had started reading and researching about darkspawn, the Grey Wardens, and the different Blights. The whole thing terrified her.

"Am I to join them?"

Irving laughed and shook his head. "No child, you have been through an ordeal. Go relax, spend the day as you wish." 

Duncan turned to the elder mage and sighed. "I will return to my quarters then."

"Of course. Elise, would you please escort Duncan to his room?"

Elise nodded and smiled warmly. "Of course First Enchanter. It would be my pleasure."

She motioned for the Warden to follow her, trying not to let off how nervous she was. If a Grey Warden was here, still looking for more help, what did that mean for the war? She had read that Wardens would sometimes conscript help, but only if the need arose. If this wasn't a Blight, then chances are that wouldn't be a worry.

"Ah here we are," she chirped. Her nerves were getting the better of her. He would likely get some more mages, perhaps some of the younger teachers, and that would be that.

He nodded his head at her and smiled politely. "Thank you Lady Amell. I appreciate it."

She nodded and turned to leave his room. She started back towards the stairs, hoping to go back to her room and sleep some more. The sound of someone running up to her changed that plan though. She turned to see Jowan jogging to catch up with her.

"Glad I caught up with you," he wheezed out and leaned over to catch his breath. It was rather comical when she looked him over. 

"Jowan you hardly had to run here," she said with a chuckle. They began the walk back to the stairs and he nodded. "Is this about this morning?"

He nodded and stopped her in the stairwell. "Do you have somewhere private we can talk?"

Elise narrowed her eyes and nodded. It wasn't like him to be this secretive. The two mages continued their walk through the halls until she pulled him into an empty room. It was full of dust and cobwebs, no light filtering in.

"What's going on Jowan? Why are you acting so... jumpy?"

He shuffled his feet and leaned out the door, motioning for someone to come in. _Great now someone else knows of my little hidey-hole._ One of the priests glided in, looking more nervous than her friend. Evidently they had been followed.

"We should be safe now," he whispered and stood beside her. She recognized her from morning services, her name was Lily.

"Jowan will you please tell me what's going on?"

He sighed and rubbed his arm. "Remember a few months back when I told you I met a girl? Well this is her."

Elise nodded and crossed her arms. "So this is the reasoning for the secrecy?"

"Lilys been given to the Chantry. Shes... not allowed to have relations with men. If anyone finds out we will both be in trouble."

"So what does this have to do with me?"

"It's not the only reason I brought you here." Now he looked panicked and Elise could feel the dread sinking into her chest. "They are going to make me Tranquil. That's why they haven't done my Harrowing." He started pacing the floor between the two women. "They are going to take everything. My dreams, my memories... my love for Lily. All gone."

Elise moved and gripped his shoulder, forcing him to stare at her. "Jowan why would you think this? You are going to get your Harrowing, I am sure of it."

"No, you don't understand! There is a rumor- people are saying I am a blood mage. That I am a danger to the Circle if I stay here."

Her blood ran cold and she put distance between them. "Are the rumors... true?"

"Of course not!" He seemed almost angry. "But it's not safe for me here anymore. I need to escape."

"Escape?!" Now it was Elises turn to panic. "Jowan you cant! The templars have your phylactery, they will hunt you down!"

"That's why I need your help! We need to go to the basement and destroy my phylactery. Its the only way Lily and I will be safe!"

She ran her hand through her hair, taking a deep breath. "What happens if we get caught? You can be made Tranquil but Ill be _killed_!"

"We can destroy yours as well, Elise! Come with us! Arent you tired of the Circle running your life?" His eyes were pleading and she groaned in frustration.

"Jowan, my phylactery was already sent to Denerim!"

"Please Elise? We will be gone before anyone even knows what has happened! If you ever cared about me as a friend, you would help me. Id do it if it was you and your templar."

Her face flushed red at the mention of Cullen. He would never run away with her. He was devoted to being a templar and to the Chantry. No matter much she may wish it of him sometimes...

"Fine. What's the plan?"

~~~

"First Enchanter," Elise called into the Irvings office. The elder had his back turned to her but showed a smile as he turned to greet her. He had a pile of books on his desk and as she moved closer, she realized they were books on blood magic.

"I trust Duncan arrived to his room without incident," the First Enchanter asked happily.

"Umm yes he did," she said. She had a hard time pulling her eyes away from the books and the question spilled out before she could stop it. "Ser, why do you have books on blood magic in here?"

The old man chuckled and didn't seem at all concerned by her question, instead placing a hand on the books. "I was told it may be unsafe to leave these books where... an unsuspecting apprentice might happen upon them."

_Jowan. He means Jowan._

"Are... The rumors true?"

"Ah but that is why they are called rumors, is it not? It is better to be safe than sorry."

She nodded and held her hands behind her back. The paper from Owain was rolled up in her palm. It took a lot of her control to keep from crushing it. "Jowan said he is to be made Tranquil... Is that true?"

"Now where would he have heard that," the Enchanter asked. Yet he had a slightly whimsical look about him. "Probably from the initiate he dallies with." 

Her shock must have been written on her face because he laughed and placed a hand on her shoulder. "I did not get to be the First Enchanter by keeping my eyes and ears closed. I also know about you and your templar friend."

Elise flushed red and quickly stared at the ground. She thought she had been careful, carefully warding the room to prevent any sound from escaping and locking the door. Would he be in trouble? The thought caused her breath to quicken but was quickly calmed by a gentle squeeze of Irvings hand and a smile.

"Neither of you are in danger from me. You two aren't the first templar-mage dalliance here and you surely won't be the last." Then his face grew serious. "Greagior says he had proof- and reliable witnesses- saying they have caught Jowan practicing blood magic."

It felt as if the floor fell out under her. He had lied to her. _Her friend. "_ So you know he plans to escape tonight then," she asked softly. Now, for the second time in her life, she had given her trust to someone who betrayed her.

"No, I did not actually. That is worrisome news indeed." She hadn't planned on telling him the plan. Yet that was precisely what happened. The hurt she was during the Harrowing was soothed when she realized the man was a demon. This was different. He was her _friend_. He showed her around the Circle when she arrived. Helped her with her studies. Held her when she missed home. She _trusted_ him. And now she would pay it back.

~~~

Elise watched as Jowan dropped his phylactery, the red substance leaking out as the glass shattered on the ground.

"Okay, we took care of it. Now let's go," she said as she watched the door. Irving and Greagior would likely be here soon. Her body trembled like a leaf. How would he react? If he was using blood magic, would he hurt her?

The trio quickly climbed through the repository, returning to the main floor of the Circle. Jowan let out an excited noise, while Elise held back. Her eyes stared holes at the ground as she heard the familiar sound of metallic feet walking towards them. She listened as the Knight-Commander spoke to Irving. When she did look up, she saw Cullen standing behind the elders of the Circle. His face wore a similar look of hurt that she must have had in Irvings office.

"And you!" She quickly looked at the Knight-Commander. She felt the color drain from her face. "A new mage already breaking the rules of the Circle."

"It wasn't her fault! I asked her to help!" Jowan quickly stepped forward to stand in front of her but she moved to the side. 

"She is here under my orders Greagior. I take responsibility for her actions." He nodded to her and she quickly moved to stand at his side, still avoiding the gazes of everyone.

"You... led us into a trap?" The hurt in his voice was real and she finally looked up at him, her brown eyes filled with tears. 

"You _lied_ to me Jowan! You were my friend and I trusted you," she yelled, her voice shaky as her tears threatened to fall. "I'm sorry."

His face tightened into a snarl and he looked away from her. "Don't bother."

"I sentence this blood mage to death! The initiate has scorned her vows and will be taken to Aeonar."

After he gave the order, chaos broke out.

The templars moved forward to arrest Lily but Jowan pulled out a dagger and shoved it through his hand. The smell of metal filled the room as a red mist circled them. Then he flung the mist forward, knocking everyone to the ground. Stars danced in her eyes. Frantic voices could be heard but the ringing in her ears was louder than the voices. Then hands gently shaking her, bringing her back to the waking world.

"You are alright," Irving whispered as she sat up. Jowan was nowhere to be found. The other templars were slowly sitting up and she could hear Greagior talking to them. 

"Did you take anything important from the repository," Irving asked and she quickly shook her head no.

"Your antics have caused a mockery of this Circle," the Knight-Commander yelled at her. Instinctively she flinched and took a step backward. "What are we going to do with you?"

"I was just doing as I was told," she said in a weak voice. The tears she held back earlier fell now. She was in just as much trouble as she would have been if she hadn't said anything at all. "I had no idea he was a blood mage I swear."

A warm hand rested on her shoulder as Irving moved to stand beside her. "As I said, she was under my order," he said firmly but softly. Elise wiped the tears that were falling down her face and sniffled. She stole a glance to the side and saw Cullen staring at her. The hurt was gone from his face and instead, his eyes held a softness in them and worry. If Greagior had his way, he could order her death here and no one could stop him.

Another pair of footsteps sounded and everyone looked towards the Grey Warden who walked into the room. "If I may, Knight-Commander. I didn't just come here to recruit more mages for the king's army. I am also recruiting for the Grey Wardens. Irving spoke highly of this mage, and I would like for her to join the ranks of the Wardens."

Elises' blood ran cold at the words. That meant leaving the Circle. Leaving the only place she felt safe. Leaving behind her only remaining friend. She didn't even hear when Duncan started talking to her.

"I- uh I'm sorry. I didn't hear you," she said in a soft voice. 

"I asked if you wished to join me," Duncan said with a sudden softness towards her. She opened her mouth to talk but closed it again. No, she didn't. She wanted to stay. Yet if she did... Greagior would likely have her killed. Yet she was just as likely to die out there. "If the Grey Wardens will have me, then I will go."

"You have an opportunity few even dream of," Irving said looking at her with sympathy. "Do not squander it." 

She nodded and bit her lip. "Can I say goodbye to my friends," she asked. Irving looked at her knowingly and nodded. 

"Ser Cullen, will you escort this mage to her quarters so that she may say her final goodbyes?" The Enchanter looked at Greagior for any disagreement but was met with a reluctant nod. Cullen moved to stand beside her and they started towards the rooms.

Neither person said anything during the duration of the walk. She let her tears fall silently as they made it to the dusty storage room. She quickly slipped inside and Cullen followed. There she let her cries out, feeling metal arms wrap around her.

"Makers breath Elise. What did you get yourself into," he mumbled into her hair. She shook her head and sobbed harder. 

"I dont want to go Cullen. I want to stay here with you." Her words came faster before she could stop them. He needed to know her feelings, even if he didn't share them. She wouldn't die in a war without telling him how she felt.

"I know we agreed nothing would come from this but the last few months with you... in this room... I-" Her breaths were coming out in ragged pants. Cullen lifted her chin, wiping away her falling tears and gently shushing her. Their lips locked together, starting gentle but becoming more forceful and urgent. Her mind mapped how his lips felt, the taste of his morning lyrium draught still lingering on his lips. Her heart raced as she gripped the back of his neck. She didn't want it to end. She just wanted to wake up. It was all a bad dream.

Cullen pulled away first, his cheeks flushed red. His eyes were full of sorrow as he brushed an amber hair strand out of her face. "I feel the same way Elise," he whispered. She never heard him sound so sure of anything. There was no stutter. No uncertainty. "I'll wait for you to come back."

She giggled and shrugged. "Promise?" She had no right making him promise that. He was still a templar, devoted to his duties. And she was a mage. But maybe it could be overlooked since she was becoming a Grey Warden.

"Always," he whispered. It made her feel warm and safe. Like everything would be okay. 

"Do you think I can write to you?"

He chuckled and rubbed the back of his neck. "Oh- um of course. That is, if you want to."

She smiled and nodded. "I wouldn't have asked if I didn't want to." 

He turned red and cleared his throat. "Ah yes. You did, didn't you?"

She sighed and glanced at the door. "I guess its time, isn't it?" Her heart sank as the smile on his face fell. He leaned down and gave her a quick kiss before leading her to the door. The walk back down to the Warden was long. When Irving saw them, he gave her a sympathetic smile and placed his hands on her shoulder.

"Be proud child. You have grown so much and I am proud of the young lady you have become."

She nodded before taking a deep breath. "Thank you for everything First Enchanter," she whispered and the old man gave her a warm smile. He stepped back and Duncan cleared his voice. 

"Come along, your new life awaits." 

And so it did.


	3. Chapter 3

It took a week to reach Ostagar. Elise remained quiet for most of the trip, only talking to Duncan if he said something to her. It wasn't like he didn't try to converse with her. He would bring up questions about her life in the Circle, ask her about her family. She answered what she could and slowly started warming up to the man. After completely embarrassing herself trying to mount his horse of course. He laughed as she fell off the first time, then offered to help the second. 

Eventually, the ruins appeared ahead of them. The nerves had gone away but had come back in full force. They walked up the stone pathway into the surprisingly lively camp. Mabari could be heard barking in the distance, the sounds of metal striking metal as soldiers ran drills, and orders being given rang out. A large tower loomed to the side, reminding her of the Circle.

She hadn't realized Duncan stopped walking until she ran into him, the metal on his armor ringing out softly. Her face flushed red and she muttered an apology, the Warden just politely smiling.

"It is alright Elise. I understand it is a lot to take in-"

"Duncan!"

Their conversation was interrupted by a man in gold-colored armor approaching them. He had two armored men following him as if they were guarding him. The man's blonde hair was partially pulled back and he had a cheerful grin on his face, despite the war that they would be walking into.

"King Cailan! I didn't expect-"

"A royal welcome?" Elise froze as she realized she was staring at the _King of Ferelden_! No one said he would be here. She had no idea what to do, her body freezing in a panic. No one seemed to pay her much mind as she slipped behind the Warden-Commander, keeping her gaze down.

"...I take it this is she?"

_Crap._

"Ah yes, allow me to introduce you, Your Majesty-"

"No need for formalities," the king said with a joyous laugh. Duncan stepped aside and Cailan walked up to Elise, who was growing more panicked by the minute. "What is your name friend," he asked.

"E-Elise Amell Your Majesty," she whispered. Cailan chuckled and gently took her hand, placing a ginger kiss on her knuckles. Her face flamed red. For a moment, her voice and breath caught in her throat.

"Allow me to be the first to welcome you to Ostagar. It is a pleasure to meet a woman as beautiful as yourself," he murmured. Her blush only grew more. She heard Duncan clear his throat and move to stand beside her. The king straightened himself. "I understand you come from the Circle of Magi? I trust you have some spells to help in the upcoming battle?"

"I've only just come out of my apprenticeship, Your Majesty," she said timidly. "I will try to be helpful wherever I can though."

"Your abilities are still better than some of the men here. The Wardens are lucky to have you." 

She didn't know how to respond so she just nodded her thanks. She watched as the men discussed the battle. The king seemed so carefree. Were the battles going that well? Why was she even needed as a recruit then? Silently, she just twisted one of her amber locks around her finger. Finally Duncan turned back to face her, the king departing to return to his tent, and motioned her to follow him into the camp.

"He doesn't seem to take this seriously," Elise stated and Duncan nodded. He looked grim after the talk with the king.

"We have had several victories but the horde grows everyday. By now, they look to outnumber us. I know there is an Archdemon behind this. But I cannot ask the king to act solely upon my feelings."

"But you're a Grey Warden!" She hadn't meant to yell and instantly reeled her voice back. "He seems to respect you greatly, why wouldn't he listen?"

"He believes our legend alone makes him invulnerable," Duncan said with frustration. "He doesn't seem to think we need to wait for the Wardens of Orlais to arrive before we go into battle. So we must do with what we have and hope Teryn Loghains troops make up the difference." The man sighed and crossed his arms. "We should proceed with the Joining ritual without delay."

"A ritual?"

"Every recruit goes through a secret ritual called the Joining in order to be a Grey Warden. It's brief but the preparation must begin soon," he said and looked towards the camp. "I am sorry, but I must ask you to trust me."

First her Harrowing, now another secret ritual. Nothing could ever be easy. Elise nodded and looked around her. Duncan continued talking, pointing out the areas of the camp for her to explore, telling her where to find the other three recruits. 

"When you are ready, there's another Grey Warden by the name of Alistair. Tell him and he will summon the others so you may begin your preparations. Until then, I will be at the Grey Wardens tent should you need me."

~~~

It seemed like she had wandered around for hours. The camp was huge. At every turn she seemed to get lost or pulled into a conversation. She met two of the recruits, Jory and Daveth. Jory was pleasant to talk to. A gentleman from Redcliffe but lived in Highever. He seemed excited to be a Warden. Daveth was a different story. His entire being made her uneasy though she was unsure why. That conversation was ended as soon as she could step away.

Finally she decided to go search for the Grey Warden Duncan mentioned. It wouldn't do her any good to stall any longer. She started in the direction Duncan had pointed out to her, trying to find anyone that resembled a Warden. Instead she saw a familiar head of white and her heart soared.

"Wynne!"

The older mage turned towards the direction that her name came from and Elise charged towards her. Any fear she had before was gone now. There was at least one familiar face here now that she could fall back on if she became lonely.

"Apprentice Amell? What are you doing here?" The woman looked skeptical and frowned as she scanned the mage over. 

"Irving sent me to the Grey Wardens after my Harrowing. Jowan turned out to be a blood mage and the Knight-Commander tried to say I was under his influence!" Her words came out a jumbled mess. The older mage looked her over once more before nodding.

"Well I see Irving has chosen well. You always did seem to do better than your colleagues when it came to your courses. Are you nervous? You will be fighting alongside the king. Not bad for someone just out of their apprenticeship."

Elise flushed and nodded. "Everyone keeps commending me on my skills but they are no different than any freshly Harrowed mage. I just hope they are good enough. The king seems to think the battle will go smoothly though."

Wynne laughed lightly and nodded. "Yes well, a king must never let his true emotions show. If he showed he was worried, the troops would see it and they would not fight as well. His mood affects morale."

That made sense. Elise sighed and looked around the camp. "I'm supposed to find another Grey Warden, Alistair. Have you seen him anywhere?" If she didn't have to keep running all over the camp, it would be perfect. At the mention of his name, the older mage rolled her eyes and grinned. 

"I think I saw someone by that name pestering one of our mages in that direction." Elise smiled and waved her goodbyes before walking off. She had pointed to her left so maybe if she just kept walking, she would find him.

And she did. He was arguing with a mage in some remote corner of the camp. She watched as the mage grew angry with the man- or boy? The Warden didn't look much older than her, his ginger hair sticking up in random directions as if he had just rolled out of bed. He acted like a child too, seeming to antagonize the man the more the conversation rolled on.

"Warden Alistair," she called out and he turned to look at her. His golden eyes looked her over curiously before returning to his conversation with the mage. _Rude._ The man must have gotten his fill of the man-child because he stormed off, barely missing her shoulder as he passed.

"Ahh that's what I love about the Blight: it brings people together." Now he turned to face her. Elise crossed her arms and shifted her weight, sizing the Warden up in front of her. 

"Are you Alistair," she asked. Annoyance dripped from her but he had blatantly ignored her when she called him the first time. He tilted his head curiously and nodded.

"Yeeees and who are you? I don't recall seeing you here before. Are you another mage?" Elise glanced down at her robes and then back at her staff before shrugging.

"Don't know. I don't know how I got these robes or this staff."

She tried to keep a straight face as his expression grew more confused before the sarcasm hit him. "Oh ha-ha. Yes very funny. You must be Duncans new recruit then, from the Circle. I only just got back with one of our recruits myself a few days ago. I'm Alistair, the new Grey Warden."

"Umm, I know. I said your name," she stated and rolled her eyes. He was a very strange man that was for sure. He blushed and shuffled his feet, nodding as he stared at the ground. Very, very strange man. "Anyway, Duncan told me to come find you when I was ready and I'm ready."

That got his attention. He straightened up and nodded, motioning her to follow him as they returned to Duncan's tent to discuss the ritual preparations.

~~~

They popped out of the ground. Alistair had warned them, part of him being able to sense the darkspawn. Yet Elise still wasn't prepared for how they looked. Flesh oozed off their bodies, the smell of decay and rotten meat filled the air. She would have nightmares about these things, that was for sure. 

She sprayed flames at an oncoming group, watching the fire engulf them. The smell... Well, it made her not want to use her fire spells. The stench only got worse, now becoming burning rotten flesh. She hadn't even finished charging her next spell when she was knocked to the ground. A hurlock stood over her, roaring in her face. She threw up her barrier as it swung its blade down on her with a cry.

The blighted sword bounced off the barrier, giving her the chance to scramble to her feet. It charged her but was stopped short as a greatsword severed its torso from the rest of its body. She looked at the warrior in front of her, nodding her thanks. She hadn't met him until they got ready to head out here. He had arrived just before her and Duncan, a noble from Highever. He acted every part of one too.

He glanced over her as if he were checking for injuries than quietly cleaned off his blade. In the background, Daveth complained loudly about fighting the darkspawn while Alistair reminded him for what felt like the hundredth time not to lose his vial. They were supposed to collect the darkspawns blood, for whatever reason. She leaned over the monster in front of her and uncorked hers, gathering what little blood ran out.

"Are you okay? I saw you take a nasty fall," she heard from behind her. She hadn't heard Alistair walk up behind her. She jumped a little and he chuckled, offering his hand to help her stand up. "Sorry, didn't mean to startle you. Just wanted to make sure you weren't hurt too badly."

"No, not too badly. I will feel it tomorrow though that's for sure." She didn't miss the somewhat sorrowful expression on the Wardens face. Daveth started yelling for her before she could ask.

"Hey mage! I need your help over here." 

Elise tried to hold back her sound of disgust as she walked over to the man. He was bleeding from a cut on his arm. Instead of offering to heal it, she decided to feign ignorance.

"What is the problem Daveth?"

"Well I have a cut. Why don't you do your magical... thingie or whatever and heal me?" The man grinned wickedly at her. Now she _really_ was going to play with him.

"I don't know any healing magic so I can't help you. Sorry," she said as sweetly as possible. The man widened his eyes and looked at Alistair. "She's joking right?"

"I don't know. I've known her as long as you have."

Now he was annoyed. Every insult he could think of came out of his mouth as she just watched with a self-satisfied grin. She would not use her magic to heal every bump and scratch. There were more important things she needed her energy for. The rogues yelling was growing tiresome though. She was about to tell him to stop whining like a child but the brown-haired warrior beside her beat her to it.

He tossed Daveth an injury kit and promptly told him to _stop yelling before he summons more darkspawn._ Elise laughed and turned to follow the other recruit and Warden as they continued up the path. They had their darkspawn blood, but now they needed whatever these treatises were. Duncan mentioned they were in some old ruins. Yet everywhere they turned, there were ruins. She heard Alistair call out, telling them there were more of the monsters ahead.

The skirmishes grew more frequent the further the group moved into ruins. Her arms were growing tired. She was slipping up, leaving herself open more and more. More than once, one of the guys had to come to her rescue. Soon enough they made it to the center of the ruins.

"Spread out! We need to find the treaties before more darkspawn arrive."

It didn't take long for Elise to find the cache. It was tucked away under the rubble, but she could feel the remnants of magic oozing off it. She leaned down and tried to lift the crumbling parts of the chest. 

"Uh Alistair, wasn't the box suppose to be sealed shut?"

The warrior came over and she pointed to the empty box. There were no treaties inside. "Duncan isn't going to like this," Alistair whispered. Elise nodded.

"Well, well, well. What do we have here?" 

Everyone turned towards the sudden voice. Perched upon a fallen pillar stood a woman. Her raven-colored hair was pulled into a messy bun on the back of her head. Elise looked over the woman, seeing the staff on her back. _Must be an apostate._ She wore very little to cover her chest and she could see them men beside her gapping at the sight.

She watched as the woman made her way down the ramp, approaching the recruits. Her yellow eyes stood out against her pale skin. She had an intimidating air about her. The men that stood behind her all readied their weapons, preparing for an attack. Yet Elise found herself not willing to do the same. 

"What are you- a scavenger or an intruder?" The woman looked directly at her. Elise looked back at Alistair, their leader, who just shrugged. She wasn't going to be the one to say anything. This isn't what she came here for. Diplomacy was not in her wheelhouse.

"We are neither," the nobleman spoke out. "The Grey Wardens owned these towers once. Who are you and why are you residing here?"

"Aedan," Alistair whispered, "What are you doing?"

The mage just laughed at the group and swung her arms out. "Surely you can see 'tis a tower no longer. The Wilds have claimed it as its own and therefore, so have I."

The woman began speaking, telling them how she watched them as they traveled through the Wilds. Elise shuffled from foot to foot. The magic in her veins stirred as she finally began to prepare for a battle. It was five against one. But the one was a mage. She would have the upper hand, that was for sure.

She directed more questions at Aedan, whose grey eyes never left the woman's yellow ones. Alistair told him not to answer, fearing she was Chasind. That earned him yet another laugh.

"Oh, you fear barbarians will swoop down upon you," the woman teased and Elise couldn't hold back her smirk. She gave Alistair a run for the sassiest person she had come across since leaving the Circle.

"Yes, swooping is bad," he muttered in an annoyed voice. Now Daveth stepped in, stressing his concerns about her being a Witch of the Wilds. Elise had read briefly about them but the libraries didn't contain much. Put irrealistic thoughts in apprentices' minds she figured.

"You there!" Her thoughts were put on hold as the witch spoke to her directly now. "Women do not frighten like little boys. Tell me your name and I shall tell you mine."

Elise froze, her body not willing to work. She hated being put on the spot. Aedan and Alistair had moved closer to her now, probably to protect her in case a fight did break out.

"E-Elise A-Amell," she managed out. It was weak and trembled. So much for not frightening like men. The witch laughed and shook her head. 

"Well then. You may call me Morrigan. I assume you sought what was in that chest, yes?"

Aedan answered this time and Elise was grateful for his interference. Each word he spoke was smooth and eloquent, practiced likely from a child. He was better suited for this than she was. She listened as Alistair antagonized the woman. For someone worried about her being Chasind, he really seemed to enjoy pushing her buttons. Maybe he wanted to be a toad.

Elise listened as Aedan conversed with the woman. Daveth and Jory still voiced with worries behind her and Alistair looked on with concern and distrust. That made her almost laugh. The woman's mother had the necessary documents, yet if it wasn't for Aedan, she was sure Alistair might let them go. Some leader he was supposed to be. 

Eventually the woman agreed to take them to her mother, and Elise breathed a sigh of relief. No one would be toads today.

~~~

_Ser Cullen Rutherford,_

_I hope this letter gets to you. I'm sending it with a raven I saved in the Wilds today, though I am unsure how or even if you will receive it. It really made one guy mad since I refused to heal him after one of our matches. I met a_ _real_ _Witch of the Wilds! Thought Alistair (the Grey Warden who is helping Duncan) seemed keen on her making us into frog stew._

_I am a Grey Warden now. The Joining... well it was awful. There were four of us, only two of us made it out. I can't tell you about it but it's not something I will soon forget._

_How are things at the Circle? I won't lie, I do feel homesick. I miss hearing Irving and Greagiors fights during the day. Seeing the apprentices learning new magics. Even miss sitting in the boring apothecary classes. I miss seeing a certain friends stumbling, blushing mess whenever he spoke to me. I wonder how he is doing? Doing well I hope._

_One of the other Wardens said the big battle is going to happen soon, real soon. I am terrified. We faced darkspawn in the Wilds and they are terrifying. I fear I will see them in the Fade tonight._

_Alistair has suggested I get my rest, saying we will be training come morning. I hope they don't wake up early. I don't want to wake at dawn._

_~~Yours Tru~~ ~~Sending the warmest wishes~~ Your friend_

_Warden-Acolyte Elise Amell (Look I even have a rank!)_


	4. Chapter 4

_ Okay, I got this. Just climb the tower, light the beacon, get to the battle. Got it.  _ Elise repeated this to herself over and over again. They could hear the battle start below, metal striking metal and the occasional warrior cry. Aedan and Alistair ran ahead, narrowly dodging the flaming boulders launched at them. She wasn't doing much better, barely keeping up with them. They didn't prepare for battles in the Circle. 

Fires burned around the Wardens as they ran across the bridge. An explosion rang out behind them, and she turned to see two archers lying on the ground. Elise turned to run back and help them, but Aedan grabbed her arm. 

"We don't have time Elise," he yelled over the fighting. He pulled her along with him before she could let out a protest. There was no need for all three of them to go to the tower. Alistair or Aedan could have stayed down with Duncan and the king. Cailan was insistent on all three of them going.

"Do you think there will be an Archdemon," she asked Alistair, who just shrugged. 

"Let's hope not."

They reached the bottom of the tower just as two guards came running out. Their armor was covered in black blood and wore panicked faces.

"You're... You're Grey Wardens right? You have to help us. The towers been taken!"

Alistair pushed up from behind her and frowned at the man. "What do you mean? Taken how?"

"Darkspawn! They came from the lower levels! Most of my men are dead. It's completely overrun."

"Then we have to get to the beacon and light it ourselves!" Alistair and Aedan moved to head inside but she held back, turning to face the guards. There was no reason they couldn't fight. The sooner they lit the beacon, the faster they could get to the battlefield.

"Come with us. Help us retake the tower," she said quickly. The men shook their heads in disagreement. 

"She's right, we could use the help, and I don't see any reason you can't fight," Aedan said from beside her. "Don't let your men's sacrifice be for nothing. Help us reach the top of the tower so we can rejoin the battle."

The soldiers looked between each other before reluctantly giving in. It bothered her some that they turned her down but listened to her fellow Warden. Yet she understood. She was a mage who had never seen a fight until the day she arrived at Ostagar. Despite being eighteen, she barely passed for it. Her young face and slightly shorter stature made her appear at least four years younger. Aedan Cousland was a year older, but he had been trained on being a warrior she assumed, plus he was likely taught battle strategy. Something she knew nothing about. And Alistair traveled with Duncan  _ and _ had been a Warden six months longer than either of them. 

The group quickly jogged towards the tower, where the sounds of fighting only grew. There were several squads of darkspawn engaging one or two soldiers each, though the soldiers were on the losing side of the battles.

Elise threw barriers over her group as they joined the fight. Her staff threw out balls of frost while her mana slowly replenished. It seemed she was always on the low side, supplementing it with her lyrium potions she had grabbed. Her body hummed as she sent wave after wave of fire into the darkspawn. Her focus was waning though, and a rogue  _ fireball _ landed too close to Alistair, knocking him off his feet.

Panicked, she rushed over to his side but he was already standing again. "Change sides on us have you," he teased as she healed the small burn on his leg. How could he still joke in the middle of a fight? She just shook her head, unable to get anything out before another darkspawn pushed towards them.

They continued their push towards the tower, taking down the small squads as they moved. Finally they made it to the tower. Alistar and Aedan pushed the door open while Elise held back, giving them cover as they inched their way in. The smell of blood hung heavily in the air. A soft buzzing at the back of her skull told her there was still darkspawn around, and close.

They walked into the opening where a fire roared to life, alerting the creatures to their presence. Quickly dealing with them, the group paused for a moment, glancing around. "How do we know where to go," Aedan asked as he cleaned his blade off. Alistair shrugged and glanced towards the ceiling. 

"I'm assuming up, but I'm not sure. I never came here honestly."

Elise looked around then moved towards the hallway. "Its set up kind of like the Circle is. I think I can get us there," she said carefully. She shook her head, hoping to get the buzzing to stop. "I just can't seem to focus. It's like I have flies buzzing in my head."

"You learn to block it out in battle," Alistair stated. "That's how we know darkspawn are around. It's the taint stirring, bringing us to them and them to us."

"Well, it better correct itself quickly. We have work to do," Aedan growled and moved out into the hallway. Elise nodded and led them through the hall, granting protection as they climbed the tower and dealt with the creatures hidden inside. 

"Makers breath! What are these darkspawn doing ahead of the rest of the horde? There wasn't suppose to be any resistance here!" Alistair looked almost panicked as they reached the second floor. Elise shrugged and leaned on her staff. Her mana levels had yet to return to full without the help of her lyrium potions, and her body was starting to slow down.

"Have you tried telling them they are in the wrong place," she offered, hoping to lighten the dismal mood. Aedan chuckled as he removed his greatsword from his back. "Besides, weren't you complaining about not getting to fight? Now you get your chance, and you want to whine about it."

"Yes, this is all just a big misunderstanding. We'll laugh about it later." He rolled his eyes in annoyance. Elise bit back another smart remark. He really had the nerve to roll his eyes when he did everything in his power to annoy others? "We need to get going, Teryn Loghain is waiting for the signal."

They continued their push through the tower. There wasn't much talking to be had between the group, unless someone called for assistance. Her potion stash was growing low now, and she was relying on her staff more and more. She winced as one of the tower guards fell, the hurlock flinging the soldier's blood as it pulled the blade out. She let out a cry and sprayed fire towards it, watching the creature burn.

"Elise, you okay," Alistair called over the fighting. He had a hurlock and genlock paired against him, blocking more than attacking. Elise quickly changed tactics, casting a quick  _ winters grasp _ on the genlock. It froze in place, giving Alistair a chance to bash against it with his shield and shatter it, focusing more on the hurlock.

Soon that battle was over, and they were climbing the stairs to the third floor. Elise's muscles screamed for rest, and she stumbled backwards, right into Alistairs arms. 

"Hey, are you okay," he asked urgently. "You never answered me earlier." His eyes scanned over her looking for any wounds.

"I'm fine," she lied. She hadn't been wounded, but her muscles screamed in pain. Her head buzzed more now, but it wasn't the same as the bottom of the tower. She was pushing her body and was paying the price for it now. 

"Let's pay a little more attention to your footing then, yeah," Aedan stated with a sigh before pushing past them. Alistair gave her one more check, worry still in his gold eyes, before moving up the stairs. She sighed and quickly followed behind them, pushing the screaming from her muscles to the back of her mind.

They pushed through the entryway, taking care of the darkspawn that lingered there. The sound of mabaris barks and growls filtered through the air. As they turned the corner, cages of mabari lined the wall, lunging against their pens in an attempt to get to the darkspawn. As the men charged forward, Elise moved to the lever in the middle in the room and pulled it. The cage doors flung open and the mabari rushed out. Thanks to the extra help, they cleared the room quickly.

"We should be getting close to the top," she huffed as the group came to the last set of stairs. By now, even the men were huffing with exhaustion. They pushed through and opened the door. "There!" Alistair pointed towards the beacon and they ran towards it, excited to finally be through the tower. It was easier going down than up. 

Their advances were halted when they entered the open ring. A giant ogre stood before them, its attention now on them as the door slammed shut behind them. It roared, rattling every bone in her body, before lowering its head and charging towards them. Aedan and Alistair rolled to the left while Elise rolled to the right to avoid its large horns. The remaining tower guard couldn't get moved into and was flung into the far wall, collapsing into a broken heap of bones and meat.

Elise cast  _ winters grasp _ on it but it didn't seem to affect it, barely slowing the monster down. So she popped the cork on another lyrium potion, swallowing the bitter liquid quickly and sending a fireball across the hall to hit the ogre.

"It's charging again," Aedan yelled and she threw a barrier over them as it rammed its head forward. It felt like an Age had passed before it showed any sign of slowing down. Elise cast another  _ winters grasp  _ and as the darkspawn slowed down, Alistair leaped onto its back, stabbing his blade into its neck repeatedly with a thunderous roar. The ogre came crashing down and the ginger-haired Warden rolled off its back.

"The beacon is over here. Can you-" Alistair didn't get to finish his sentence before Elise was igniting the flame.

"There! That should do it."

"Great! Let's get down to-"

"Guys, you might want to see this." Aedan's voice was dark, his face grim. They jogged over to the window and looked where he was pointing. You could see the kings colors shrink as the sea of flame and blackness took over but nowhere was the black and gold of the teryns colors.

"Where are they?! They should be on the field!" Alistair's voice was full of panic and worry. Elise felt her own concern grow. If the darkspawn were ahead of them here, what if they caught the teryns troops? There would be no advantage then.

"I don't know," Aedan growled, "Let's just get down-"

Loud sounds came from behind them like someone was running up the stairs. The group turned just as the darkspawn burst through the door. They were cornered; there was no way out unless they fought their way down. Elise quickly threw up barriers over them as Alistair and Aedan charged the group. 

They made quick work of the creatures it felt. Every one she froze was getting shattered by shield or sword while others burned under her flames. Yet the waves just kept coming. For every hurlock killed, it seemed they would multiply. 

Elise had charged up another  _ flame blast _ . They weren't going to win this. There were too many of them for just the three of them. Just as she got ready to release it, pain rippled through her shoulder. She let out a cry of pain as an arrow buried itself into her shoulder but was cut short as two more entered her chest. 

All the air was sucked from her as she stood for a moment dazed. There was no pain really, only a cold chill rolling down her spine. Her body was numbing as she staggered backwards, trying to find something to hold. She saw Aedan glance back and say something to Alistair but couldn't hear what. The edges of her vision darkened as she fell forward, letting the ground under her swallow her.

~~~

Voices were arguing. They were faint but familiar. Elise's mind pulled her towards them, feeling the remains of sleep fade away. As she slowly opened her eyes, she had expected to see... well, not a roof.  _ Where am I?  _ Taking a glance, she realized she was in someone's home. How? She was in the tower when.... 

Alistair. Aedan. Panic gripped her. Where were they if she was here? Did they survive? She moved to sit up but pain ripped out from her chest and shoulder, making her groan. 

"Ah, your eyes finally open. Mother will be please."

Elise looked towards the edge of the bed and saw the witch from days prior. "Morrigan," she croaked. That meant she was in the witches hut. But how-

"You were injured, then Mother rescued you. Do you not remember?" The girl seemed to read her mind and she was grateful for it. "What about Alistair? And Aedan? They were-"

"They are alive and well. They only received minor injuries compared to yours."

Elise nodded and slowly sat up, hissing through the pain. It wasn't as bad now. She looked down at the bandages wrapped around her chest and sighed. "Well, thanks to your mother," she said softly. "But we need to return to the camp. Duncan probably thinks we are dead."

"The darkspawn won your battle," the witch said plainly. "The man who was to respond to your signal quit the field and left your king to die. Your friend, the dim-witted, suspicious one... he isn't taking it well."

Elises stomach dropped. So that's why Loghain didn't show up. He hadn't been cut off by darkspawn. He just  _ left. _ He abandoned his king and left. 

"Your friends are outside by the fire. Mother asked to see you when you woke." Morrigan's voice broke her out of her thoughts, and Elise nodded weakly. Then she glanced down at her lack of attire and blushed. 

"I don't suppose-"

"There is a chest over in the corner. You may help yourself to whatever lay in there though I should warn you, you may not find anything your size."

The witch walked out the door so Elise could get dressed. She walked over to the chest and dug around for a few minutes before finding a slightly too big pair of nugskin pants and a large cotton tunic. The shirt was definitely too big, but it could be tucked into the pants. Once she was dressed, she ran her fingers through her hair, combing out the knots that had formed during her rest.

She slowly pushed open the door, hearing the angry voices of her fellow Wardens before she even got outside.

"I'm not leaving here without her!" Came Alistair's voice. She leaned against the side of the house, wondering when they would notice she had come outside.

"She can barely fight Alistair! She nearly got us killed and herself!" Aedan's voice was one of frustration, and he was pinching the bridge of his nose. His brown hair had been pulled back into a ponytail that rested on the nape of his neck, exposing a new scar on his cheek that hadn't been there previously.

"I think your Warden friend would like to speak for herself," Flemeth said with an annoyed tone. She couldn't help but wonder how long they had been out here arguing. Or how long she had been out. Both men looked over at her, Alistair's eyes full of relief while Aedans was red, likely from embarrassment.

"You're alive. I thought for sure you had died," the ginger said quickly. Elise couldn't help but laugh and shrug her shoulders.

"Nope, still alive to hear people argue about me," she said, and both men ducked their heads with a guilty look. "I assume you know about..." She didn't have to finish her sentence, the sorrow evident in his eyes. 

"Everyones dead. Duncan, the Grey Wardens, even the king... all dead." She could see his eyes glitter with unshed tears and her heart yearned to hug him, tell him it was going to be okay even if she didn't truly know.

"If it weren't for Morrigan's mother, we'd be dead too," Aedan said softly. Any trace of frustration from earlier was gone. Instead, he wore a mournful look as well. He may not have known Duncan as long, but they were still Fereldan and lost their king.

"Do not talk about me as if I were not here, lad." Flemeths tone was not harsh or unkind, more like she was scolding a child.

Elise glanced around the woods, inhaling deeply. "So what will we do now? With Duncan..." Her voice hitched and she swallowed the knot in her throat. "With Duncan gone, we don't even know where to begin."

"It has always been the Grey Wardens' duty to unite the lands against the Blight. Or did that change when I wasn't looking?" The witch looked between the three Wardens and Elise bit her lip. She barely knew anything of the Grey Wardens other than what she read. 

"It will be hard to unite everyone thanks to Teyrn Loghain leaving the field," Aedan spoke finally. "If we try to talk out against him, we are putting ourselves on the chopping block."

"I still don't understand," Alistair groaned in frustration. "Why would he do it? He left his son-in-law to die on that field! His  _ king _ , a man he knew his whole life!"

"Why would Howe kill my family? They were both honorable men at one point." Aedan pointed out darkly. The candle lit up in her head as she realized why he had been so quiet in the days prior to the battle and Joining. He wasn't being rude. Well, maybe he was. But he was also mourning.

"Men's hearts hold shadows darker than any tainted creature." Elise noticed the slightly pained expression on her face, but it disappeared as soon as it came up. "Perhaps he thinks he can outmaneuver the Blight. Perhaps he doesn't realize the true evil behind it."

"The archdemon," Alistair said grimly. He still had a distant look in his eye. "How would we even stop the Blight? No ones been able to do without  _ at least  _ half a dozen nations at his back!"

"What about the treaties," Elise said softly. Aedan looked at her with a raised eyebrow and she couldn't hold back her eyeroll. "I may not be made for battle Cousland, but I know some history and I did pay attention. Couldn't we use them, gather help from everyone?"

"That sounds like an army to me," Flemeth said slyly.

Alistair turned to look at his fellow Wardens. for once since the battle, his eyes held hope. "Do you think we can do it? Can we really put an end to the Blight?"

"Not like we have a choice," Aedan shrugged and crossed his arms. Elise nodded in agreement.

"Aedan grew up in diplomacy and you have been a Warden longer than either of us," she said proudly. "If anyone can do it, it's you guys at least." The men nodded and Flemeth directed them to the hut where Morrigan had made a stew for supper. Elise went to follow but the woman reached out, putting a hand on her arm to stop her.

"Tread carefully girl," the elder witch mused. "Your heart will bring you happiness, but it will also cloud your judgment and change you. The world will need you, even after this war. Don't let your hurt define who you are." She removed her hand and walked off towards the hut, Alistair saying something snarky to Morrigan and getting smacked by Aedan.

Elise frowned. What did she mean hurt? She was fine. Well, as fine as one could be after nearly dying in war. Yet she couldn't shake off the cryptic warning. It was something she would just have to unpack later. For now, the three remaining Grey Wardens needed to figure out how to utilize these treaties.


	5. Chapter 5

Elise huffed as she put her tent up, choosing to keep it a distance from the others. Alistair had already had his tent and was tending to the fire, Aedan slipped off to try and catch them something to eat, and she honestly had no idea where Morrigan went. The witch was still in a sour mood after her mother forced her to leave and help them against the Blight.

Not that she was exactly welcomed. Only Aedan seemed to want her, arguing they "didn't know their way out of these Blight-infested woods." Of course, Flemeth agreed, and here they were. Three Wardens and an apostate trying to win a war against the Tainted creatures

A low groan escaped her as the tent started to fall again. What she wouldn't give to be curled up in her quarters, under her warm blankets. The smells of lyrium and ozone drifting from the classrooms, or the scent of healing potion being brewed. To hear the laughter from the other apprentices.

"I want to be where you are."

Elise turned around, seeing Alistair walking up to her with a smile. Maker, was he always this cheerful? "I'm right here. Nowhere in particular," she replied with a slight frown. He shrugged and helped steady the slowly collapsing tent.

"You just seemed like you were elsewhere. What were you thinking about?"

She shrugged and sat on the ground while he set up her tent. "Nothing really," she said finally. He moved with skill, making her slightly jealous. He made it seem easy. "When will we be reaching Redcliffe?"

Alistair stood with a grunt, having tied off the tent. "Well, we are going to stop in Lothering first. We should be there by midday tomorrow. We need to replenish our resources while we are there. Then we should be in Redcliffe in... five or six days?" 

Elise raised her eyebrows. "Is Redcliffe really that far away?"

He looked at her with surprise and tilted his head. "On foot it is. I would assume if we rode on horses we would be there in about half that time. Have you... never looked at a map?"

Her face heated up. "Well... I-In the Circle..."

"Got dinner!" Elise turned as Aedan walked up with a pair of skinned rabbits. She quickly stood up and moved to meet him at the firepit, leaving Alistair by her tent. The nobleman started putting them on the fire. 

"So tell me about yourself," Aedan spoke and Elise looked at him with curiosity. 

"What do you mean?"

"Well where are you from? Why did you join the Wardens?" Oh that will be a fun story.

"You first."

He chuckled and turned over one of the rabbits. "Well there isn't much to know that you don't already know. My family -save for my brother- were killed by Arl Howe. I offered to join the Wardens to get revenge on him. The King vowed to make him pay." He paused and turned the other rabbit. "With the King... Well, I plan on getting even with him as soon as the Blight is over." Well that turned dark. Elise watched the fire for a moment before letting out an exhale.

"Well, I don't remember much of my life before the Circle," she started out softly. "I was five when my magic first manifested, threw a temper tantrum, and started a huge lightning storm. All my siblings are mages as well, though I don't know where they are right now. I barely remember them. I was in Kinloch Hold until Duncan came, hours after my Harrowing. Then I got roped into helping a friend attempt to escape the Circle, under my First Enchanters orders, and was almost killed by my friend who turned out to be a blood mage and then the Knight-Commander. Duncan conscripted me and saved me life." 

Elise ate her food in silence, the feeling of homesickness weighing over her. She hadn't received a letter back from Cullen either. It made her wonder if sending the raven was a good idea.

Who was she kidding? Of course, it wasn't. The bird likely didn't even know where it was going, much less who to deliver the letter to. And even if it did make it, how would it find her now?

"So, you didn't actually want to be a Grey Warden?" 

She looked at Alistair and gave a sad smile. "Nope. It was either this or death. And I still almost got death." She rubbed the spot on her chest that had begun to ache and shrugged. "Anyways. No point in dwelling. How about you Alistair? We both gave our reasons. Why did you become a Warden?"

He chuckled. "Same way you both did. Drink the blood, choke on it, wake up." Aedan scoffed and smiled but Elise just narrowed her eyes at the older Warden who put his hands up in defense

"Okay okay, I'll spill. Just don't... don't catch me on fire. I was at the Chantry, training to be a templar. That's actually where I learned my skills."

"Wait, _you_ were going to be a templar?" Elise pulled her lips in over her teeth to prevent the laugh from spilling out. It didn't slip past Alistair though, and he let out a small laugh of his own. 

"Hard to believe, right? The Grand Cleric was furious, though. Duncan had to conscript me in order to get me. I thought she would have us arrested right there. Not sure why she cared, it wasn't as if she valued me highly." His face fell and it grew into a somber look, matching the face he had at Flemeths Hut. "I'll always be thankful for Duncan for recruiting me. If it hadn't been for him... I wouldn't have, I would never..."

The three Wardens grew quiet, only the sounds of the fire crackling between them and the occasional call of an owl. "I'm sorry," Elise finally whispered. "I shouldn't have brought him up."

Alistair quickly shook his head, wiping his brown eyes that were too bright. "No.. its... I should be sorry. I should be over this. They all died like heroes."

"No shame in mourning him, Alistair," Aedan whispered as he stared into the fire. She couldn't help but wonder if he was thinking about his family. Alistair nodded and cleared his throat. "Yeah. Anyway, I think I'm done talking."

She nodded in agreement and they fell silent once again. They each sat and stared at the fire, the warmth a comfort in the chilled air. After a while, exhaustion settled into her bones and muscles. The continuous walking was starting to wear her down for sure. As she stood up, prepared to say her goodnights, the flapping of wings sounded overhead. 

Both men reached for their weapons as a raven landed on the ground in front of them. Elise giggled as the men turned red, presumably from embarrassment as she leaned down to inspect the bird.

"Is that... a letter," Aedan asked skeptically and she bit her lip, encouraging the bird onto her wrist. The paper was tied gently around her leg, almost so loose it was a miracle it didn't fall off. Elise unwrapped it and slowly opened the rolled-up parchment.

_Warden-Acolyte Elise Amell,_

_The raven did well to find me, even if it started an uproar in the dining area. I must say, I wasn't expecting a letter so soon. In response to your last message, you really shouldn't make your companions mad. They are your family, you need to have each others back. Besides, you are an exceptional healer._

_The Circle has trouble of their own, some I won't bother you with on the eve of battle. First Enchanter Irving and Knight Commander Greagior are still at each other throats. You need to focus on that and making it out alive. I'll be praying to the Maker for your safety. And I wish you luck. Not that you need it or anything._

_I am sure your friend is doing quite well, though he may be lonely. I would think he might miss his short breaks when he would see you. It is quieter around here. Not that you were loud or anything._

_I hope to hear from you soon. It really has been dreadfully dull. Stay safe._

_Your friend_

_Knight-Templar Cullen Rutherford_

"Elise, are you alright?"

She blinked, not realizing she had suddenly started crying. She swiped her hand across her cheeks, wiping the tears away. "Umm yeah. I'm fine. It's a letter... from a friend. He must have written it before the battle." Her voice trailed off, and she cleared her throat. 

"Oooooh does someone have a secret crush in the Circle," Alistair teased and Elise stuck her tongue out at him, her cheeks beginning to burn. Both men started laughing and she quickly said her goodnights before quickly retreating to her tent. Despite their teasing, she felt suddenly very light. She stripped off her armor and curled up under her blanket, a smile on her face.

~~~

Dawn came far too quickly for her. The smile she had once donned had slipped away in favor of dark circles and a frown. Her dreams were plagued with the faces of darkspawn, screaming in her face, their smell managing to imbed itself in her nose. As she crawled out, she huffed softly. Morrigan was the only one that appeared awake, standing over the fire pit, mixing a pot of... something.

"Ahh, so one of you finally wakes." The witch mused. Elise frowned and sat beside the fire, still trying to rub the sleep from her eyes and the chill from her bones. 

"Where have you been going," she finally asked once her voice came to her. Morrigan never looked at her as she mixed... porridge?... in a pot. 

"I simply set up camp, the same as you do. It is clear I am not wanted here, and Mother would not appreciate if I were to return without you three in tow."

Now guilt ate at her, almost as much as the hunger did. She hadn't meant to alienate the woman. In fact, while they traveled she tried to talk to her. 

"Do not look so down; my feelings are not hurt. I prefer my solitude. You should wake your Warden friends." Morrigan pointed towards the men's shared tent and Elise nodded, walking over. She peeked in their tent wear the men were still sound asleep. With a smirk, she carefully marked out an ice mine, small enough that it wouldn't cause any real damage, just scare them awake. 

Once it was drawn up, she carefully withdrew and returned to the fireside. Elise took a bowl and began eating, keeping a side-eye watching the tent.

One minute turned into five, which turned into ten. She almost wondered if they were ever going to trip it. The loud _pop_ and twinkling of ice exploding mixed with not-so-manly yelps filled the air, nearly making Elise choke on her breakfast. _There it is._ Even Morrigan had her own smirk as the men came tumbling out of their tent.

"Morning," Elise called innocently as they pulled their breeches on and stalked towards the mages.

"You couldn't just wake us up like a _normal_ person," Aedan growled. Alistair still didn't look awake, just had a sleepy smile as he rubbed his eyes.

Elise just shrugged and pointed to the fire. "Breakfast, then we can head out." 

He continued grumbling under his breath and began dishing out his food. "Alistair," she sang, and the man jerked. He was dozing off just standing there, making her giggle. "Get food. I can hear your stomach over here."

He blinked sleepily and nodded, moving over to dish out his food. Elise finished off hers and set her bowl by the fire, telling the boys to make sure they cleaned up. Then she returned to her tent. Slipping back on the leather armor, she huffed over the feeling. She would much rather have her robes, but they had been long since destroyed. This would do, at least until they reached Lothering. Maybe they would have something there.

She finished pulling her hair back into a short braid at the base of her neck then began tearing down her tent. Maker, that was easier than putting it up. She rolled it up, securing the straps on it and walking back over to the men who had just finished their breakfast. "Do you need help packing up," she asked with a smile.

Aedan glared at her, evidently still upset about his wake-up call. Alistair, more awake now, seemed less than thrilled with her. "We should make you do it," Alistair teased, though she could hear the threat behind it. 

"I offered, didn't I?"

"Mhm, not much of a punishment then is it?"

"One would think you would show more haste to leave considering you have a Darkspawn horde to beat," Morrigan called, which only further soured poor Alistair's mood. Maybe she shouldn't have woke them up in such a manner? Once they had their tent packed, Elise started to work on killing the fire.

Something in her stirred as the last of the flames died out. She turned to look at the men who had also paused, moving towards her with hands on their weapons.

"Elise," Alistair murmured and she nodded, reaching for her staff. Morrigan had disappeared once again, shocking enough. They each turned, their backs to each other while they tried determined where the darkspawn would come from. A rustle from Aedan's side makes them all turn, weapons now fully drawn. Instead of darkspawn though, two mabari came running into their little clearing.

"Umm Alistair? Do darkspawn have mabari?" Elise looked at the dogs who bounced around at their feet, barking urgently.

"Not unless they started taking pets now. Who knew? Even darkspawn get lonely," he jested and Aedan crouched to look at the dogs.

"They don't appear to be injured."

Elise looked back towards the woods, the buzzing in her mind growing. She threw up a barrier between the three of them as an arrow _whizzed_ past Aedans head. The darkspawn poured into the area, and the battle began.

The sounds of metal squealing against metal filled the air. She let off several cold spells, slowing the darkspawn for the warriors to slice through. The mabaris, despite leading the creatures to them, actually didn't cower and lunged between the darkspawns feet, snapping and biting. _Wheres Morrigan?_

Her barrier fell after a genlock charged her, catching her off guard and knocking her down. She brought her staff up to block a blow from its sword, wincing as the shock jarred her arms. Alistair and Aedan were busy with the alpha, which put her alone. Any regret she had about pushing Morrigan off to the side, she took back. 

She brought a foot up and kicked the genlock in the knee, watching it drop back with a distorted cry. Elise scrambled to her feet; her staff held out in front of her as she shot an icy blast towards the creature. It didn't freeze. Didn't even slow. She braced herself for another blow and brought her staff up to block it when a flash of brown flew in front of her, knocking the genlock down and spraying the toxic black blood with a vicious snarl.

She panted and looked towards the warriors, scanning them for injuries. Neither seemed hurt, both cleaning off their blades. Her gaze turned to the two mabari who sat at her feet, covered in blood, little tail nubs wagging and tongues lolling to the side. She couldn't help but laugh at them, their dorky looks. "You two just think you are so special, don't you?"

The black and brown one just tilted its head while the solid brown one barked and placed its front paws on her chest, adding more mud to the mud and blood on her armor. Alistair and Aedan made their way over to the new group, concern written on their faces.

"Are you alright," Alistair asked, scanning her over while Aedan preoccupied himself with the black and brown one. 

"I'm fine, thanks to this... What are you?" She tried to look but Aedan laughed. "Its a boy."

"Thanks to this good boy," she cooed and scratched the dog between his ears. 

"Mabari are not lap dogs, they are war hounds," Aedan exclaimed and looked at the dog who was now lying at his feet. "Aren't you, girl?" She huffed at his feet and rolled onto her back.

Elise looked at the dog who was propped on her chest, his dark eyes looking at her, almost pleading. "Guys, we can't leave them out here. They'll die." She hadn't meant to sound whiny, but her heart hurt at the thought of leaving them behind. The female who had rested at Aedan's feet looked up at him expectantly, sitting up with one paw raised.

"I think they've imprinted on you," Alistair whispered and looked between the dogs. "It's a thing mabari do. They seek you out and choose you."

"I know," Aedan whispered. Elise looked at him and noticed his green eyes seemed too bright. "I had one. His name was Copper. He was a gift from my... my father." She swallowed as she watched the two stare each other down, wondering what was going through his mind. Her need to help took over and she moved over to hug him. She didn't need him to tell her what happened. Based on what he had told them already, she could assume what had happened. 

He didn't move to return the hug, but she didn't care. She just wanted him to feel better. The dogs behind her whined and she chuckled, pulling away to look at him. Aedan just looked at her with shock, but the brightness in his eyes was gone.

"Are you going to kiss? Aww, that would be so sweet!"

Elise glared up at Alistair, who wore a dopey smile on his face. "I'll show you sweet," she growled, and his smile dropped as she scooped up mud and threw it at him, splattering it on his chestplate.

"Heeeeey!"

Suddenly the fight was forgotten as lobs of mud were chucked between the three Wardens, laughter and barking filling the air. 

For a moment, they weren't Wardens trying to prevent the end of the world. They were three slow becoming friends, enjoying a free moment with their newfound pets and a raven watching the three with the most curious eyes of yellow.


	6. Chapter 6

“Do you think Morrigan will come back,” Elise whispered as they walked across a slightly ruined bridge. Aedan frowned and looked around, a hand resting on his mabari, Sage. They hadn’t seen the witch since breakfast that morning. Even after the fight with the darkspawn, she hadn’t shown up.

“I’m sure she will,” he said, though she didn’t miss the concern in his eyes. Her mabari bounced around at her feet, nearly tripping her.

“Knight, calm down,” she said only half stern. It was refreshing, seeing him act as if he were a puppy. He barked happily and moved to stand at her side, almost prancing. “How did you get Sage to behave so well?”

“I don’t. She just does,” he said with a proud smile. He pointed up ahead at some people who were sorting through some wreckage. “They look a little well-armed for refugees, don’t you think?”

She nodded and looked at Alistair, whose own gaze seemed distant. Well, he had seemed distant since their little break after the darkspawn ambush. She would check in with him once they reached Lothering. If anything, just to make sure he was okay. She turned her attention back to men in front of them, who looked more like bandits than people fleeing the Blight.

“Wake up gentlemen! More travelers to attend to! And it looks like the pretty one is their leader!” One of the men approached them and Elise tensed up. “Oh no, I’m not-”

“And so what if she is?” Aedan moved to stand beside her, arms crossed. He could have been a bodyguard in another life. Alistair moved to her other side, his brown eyes focused towards the men. She heard one of the henchmen whisper something to his leader, who just laughed and shook his head.

“They are fools to get in our way. I say teach them a lesson.”

Elise couldn’t hold back her jump, turning to see Morrigan standing as if she had not been missing for most the day. Aedan placed his hand on her shoulder and she returned her gaze to the men in front of her. 

“That’s no way to greet someone,” the man whined. 

“We aren’t interested in chatting. We need to go to be on our way,” Elise stated as politely as she could.

“That’s no problem! Just ten silvers and we will let you pass.”

“Ten silvers,” she exclaimed. “That’s ridiculous! You are preying on these people fleeing the darkspawn!” She stepped forward, her anger welling inside her. “I will not allow it any longer!” Thunder rumbled overhead and the highwaymen began pulling out their blades. 

“I told you they weren’t regular refugees,” the larger man yelled with fear.

“No, we aren’t,” Alistair finally spoke up. “We are Grey Wardens. Do you _really_ want to fight us?”

“Hey, aren’t theys the ones who killed the king,” the large man yelled again and the leader turned to face them, a murderous gleam in his eye. “Yes, traitors to Ferelden I hear. Teryn Loghain put quite the bounty on your head.”

“Excuse me?!” Elise growled and clenched her fist, feeling the lightning spark. “We didn't-”

“If we did kill the king, do you think it’s bright to fight us?” Aedan eyed the men and they began to back up slowly.

“Y-You’re right,” one of them muttered. The leader nodded in agreement and held his hands up in defense. “We will just let you get on your darkspawn killing ways, shall we? No harm done here.”

“Actually,” Elise said thoughtfully as her temper calmed down. “The Grey Wardens could use a donation. We will have to replenish our resources in the next town. Surely you could help since you inconvenienced us.” Her voice was sickly sweet, trying to match how the older mages in the Circle who would bribe the Templars. The man’s eyes swept over her with a hungry smirk.

“What do we get in return for our ah... gracious donation,” he practically purred. Her face flushed and her smooth exterior suddenly crumbled. A sound of disgust echoed in her ears as a ball of purple flame erupted around the highwaymen, their screams filling the air around them.

Elise turned around as the flames died down to the woman behind her. “Why did you do that Morrigan,” she cried out. “There was no need!”

“The man was clearly propositioning you. Surely you can’t be that naive. You should be thanking me if anything.”

Elise scoffed, choosing not to engage in an argument with the woman. It wouldn’t solve anything. She walked to where her fellow Wardens were searching the bodies, collecting any salvable things to sell in the village. 

“Well, we have twenty silver,” Aedan said with a frustrated sigh. “We might be able to purchase some health potions, or maybe some food, but not both.”

Elise nodded and looked at Alistair, who seemed to be staring off in the distance. “Those men said we killed the king, that _we_ are the traitors,” he murmured. She placed a hand on his shoulder. “He will pay for what he did. We know the truth.”

“It will be hard to prove it,” Aedan said as he stood up. “A teyrns word is taken almost as seriously as a king. If we try to stand up against him right now, we are risking our necks. I think we need to focus on these treaties before we confront him.”

“Have you read them yet?”

“I did,” Elise said excitedly. They looked at her with a raised eyebrow and she shrugged. “I was bored and they were there. We have treaties for the dwarves of Orzammar, the Dalish elves, and the mages. Question is, where do we go first?”

“I say you go after this Loghain first. Then the rest of this can be done in peace,” Morrigan spoke from her spot against a pillar. Alistair rolled his eyes and huffed. “Oh yes, he wouldn’t see that coming. Not like he doesn’t have the army, or the strategy. Didn't we just say we couldn’t do that?”

“Alright you two,” Aedan groaned. His face was buried in his hand, rubbing his forehead. “We can stand here and listen to you two argue all day but I would like to not be here when the darkspawn get here.”

Elise nodded in agreement, leaving Alistair to look sheepish and Morrigan more annoyed than anything. “Come on, we should get going.”

They began the walk down the ramp into the village. Her heart sank as she looked around the refugee camp. All these people were fleeing from the Blight and had no idea that they weren’t far enough away. She walked beside her friends, scanning the area. A familiar sight of armor caught her gaze and she froze. “Guys. That’s a templar up there.”

Alistair looked and nodded. “Yeeeeah. Probably stationed here at the Chantry. Oh, we could go see if they have any jobs. We could earn more coin-”

“ _Alistair,_ ” she hissed and pointed at her staff. “I’m a _mage._ ” He stared blankly at her, his head tilted curiously. Even Aedan looked bewildered. “If the Grey Wardens are labeled as traitors to the king, we can’t go around telling people that’s who we are,” she said with an exasperated sigh. “Which means I’ll be labeled as an apostate!”

Realization dawned on the men and they looked towards the templar then back to her. “Well,” Aedan said softly. “What are we going to do? There is no getting passed him.” Elise glanced around and smiled. “If you can distract him, I think I can sneak around him.”

“You? A Mage?” Alistair raised an eyebrow and she chuckled.

“Oh, ye of little faith. I didn’t just sit on my butt braiding hair when I was in the Circle,” she teased then glanced back towards the templar. “You guys go on ahead, I’ll meet you inside.”

She watched the men walk off and she slipped off to the side towards the refugees camp. Knight woofed softly at her and she chuckled, rubbing his head gently. “Its okay boy. We will be back with them in a moment.” Elise slipped under the fence, silently cursing herself for not taking her staff off when it got caught and she fell face first into the ground. _Why can’t I just disappear like Morrigan?_

Sounds of an argument rang out from in front of her and for a moment, she feared it was her new friends. Instead, she watched as a man shoved someone in Chantry robes. Glancing around to make sure no one was around, she hid her staff in a bush before running over.

“What’s going on here,” she asked as politely as possible. The man turned towards her with a scowl. If looks could kill, she thought for sure she would be dead. 

“Get out of here, this doesn’t concern you,” he snapped then his face lit up for a moment. “Actually, wait a minute. Perhaps you can help me out. Would you care to make a tiny profit from a beleaguered businessman?”

She couldn’t stop the snort that escaped. She crossed her arms. “I watched you push that woman. What makes you think I want to help you?”

“Didn’t I mention profit?”

“You mentioned a _tiny_ profit. Hardly worth my time to overlook an assault on a member of the Chantry.”

“He’s charging outlandish prices on things that people desperately need,” the Chantry sister cried out. Elise frowned and looked at the man, who suddenly didn’t look too thrilled.

“I-I have a limited supply. People decide what that supplies is worth to them.”

She watched as the two began arguing again, her frustration only growing. Knight whined at her side, and she leaned down to rub his head. 

“Ahh, it’s so nice to see everyone work together in a crisis. Warms the heart.”

“Everything okay?”

She turned to see Aedan and Alistair approaching her, Knight running off to play with the other mabari. The _merchant,_ if one could call him that, looked more than thrilled to see more people approaching. “Look I’ll give you lot a hundred silver if you run this group off. I’m an honest merchant, nothing more.”

“ _Honest_?” Elise shook her head and glared at the man. “You are profiting off these people’s hardship!”

“Now, now,” Aedan interjected and stepped into the middle of everyone. “Allow us to discuss this and we will let you know what we decide.” He grabbed Elises arm and pulled her off to the side, despite her protest.

“You can’t seriously be considering his offer,” she hissed angrily. He just shrugged and crossed his arms. “We need the coin Elise.”

“He’s taking advantage of these people! We can’t-”

“We can’t survive on just twenty silver pieces between the four of us. It’s a small sacrifice. These people aren’t going to survive much longer anyway with the darkspawn horde coming.”

“I won’t go along with this,” she huffed and Aedan just shrugged, remaining silent. Elise threw her hands up in frustration then walked back to the merchant. 

“No deal.”

“Elise what are you-”

“Surely you two can come to some sort of compromise,” she continued, ignoring the now seething Cousland. The merchant looked at the Chantry mother and sighed. “Perhaps... if she will allow me to charge _something._ ” The woman nodded, agreeing with stipulations. 

“Solving every squabble in the village personally? My, won’t the darkspawn be impressed.”

“Stop Morrigan,” Elise whispered but the group had already dispersed. She sighed and turned to her companions. “So what now?”

“What was that,” Aedan growled. “I told you-”

“And I told you I wasn’t going along with it,” Elise stated matter of factly. Alistair looked between them and finally stepped up. “What are you arguing about?”

“He wanted the merchant to keep overcharging these people!”

“You can’t treat everyone nicely! We need the coin!”

“Your noble friend as a point,” Morrigan stated. “These people would do the exact same given the chance.”

Elise threw her hands up and stormed off, ignoring Alistairs calls. _How can he justify that?_ Her frustration boiled under her skin as she walked across the village. No amount of coin would be worth making people suffer. That’s not what Grey Wardens were about. 

Knight trotted at her side, huffing softly at being pulled away from playing with his friend. She sighed and gently rubbed his head, apologizing to the war hound before wandering into the field. It was open, the smell of wildflowers drifting around her, calming her. She sat on the ground beside a large boulder, fiddling around with the pale purple and blue flowers’ petals.

“What do we have here?” Elise popped up, her magic humming under skin. A man with a mabari and three followers approached her, a lazy smile on his face. Knight growled and she reached down to grip his scruff. “A little girl lost?”

“I’m hardly a little girl,” she stated politely and held her hands out in front of her. “I don’t want any trouble.”

“Who said we were looking for it?” The man walked towards her, his body blocking any escape as her back hit the rock. Her heart began racing as he reached up to stroke the side of her face. Knight lunged forward, latching onto the mans arm with a growl. He fell away, Elise quickly distancing herself and prepared a _winters grasp_ and freezing one of his followers. The other two charged her, their boss still preoccupied with the mabari on his arm. 

The fear that she couldn’t use her magic to her full potential began to set in. Templars would feel her magic being cast so she was already at the risk of getting caught. Of all the moments to wish to be trained in a blade-

A shield crashed into her face, wetness spreading down as she fell back. Stars danced in her vision and tears burned behind her eyes. A moment of distraction causing her downfall, imagine that. Elise expected a blade in her gut, but nothing came. Only the sound of metal screeching against metal, men grunting, and more barking. She opened her eyes but the world spun above her so she laid there, listening to the fighting and praying to the Maker she hadn’t alerted the Templars.

Soon the sound of the fighting died down and the field grew quieter. Elise opened her eyes to worried pairs of green and brown orbs staring back at her, still spinning slightly. She was faintly aware of something being pushed against her face, stinging the open wound and bringing tears to her eyes again.

“Sorry,” Aedan whispered and Alistair sat beside her, his eyes looking seemingly distracted. She met his gaze and held it before he must have realized he was staring, a slight pink smattering brushing across his face. He reached into her hair, pulling out a purple flower that had ended up in her from her fall. “You... uh had something there.”

“Afraid I’ll look prettier than you,” she teased and he laughed, the corners of his eyes crinkling.

“You figured it out. My looks are the only thing going for me. Though it’ll be a tough competition if that scars over.”

“Guess I’ll have to give you a scar to match, even the playing field.”

“No damaging the goods,” Aedan stated, making Alistair gasp, and handed her a potion to drink. She swallowed it quickly and took the hands offered to her, heaving her to her feet. The ground shifted under her and she nearly fell again but metal arms wrapped around her waist. Now it was her turn to blush as Alistair held her upright. “Maybe you should rest.” Aedan looked at Alistair who nodded in agreement.

“I have a room you can take her to,” a new voice spoke. Elise looked to over Aedan’s shoulder at the red-headed woman in chantry robes. Beside her stood a... well a large looking man. Suddenly she felt very intimidated and looked at the men with curiosity. Instead of introducing her, Alistair began leading her back towards the village, taking a key offered to him by the woman.

“Alistair you can’t take me to the Chantry. The templars will know I’m a mage. And who was-”

He just laughed and shook his head, leading her to the inn. “For someone who just took a shield to the face, you are awfully chatty.” He led her to the bar, offering to let her sit but her feet had finally settled under her so she followed him. “Can you direct us to Sister Lelianas room please?” 

“Down the hall, first door on the left.”

Elise followed Alistair to the room, allowing him to unlock the door and entered. She darted to the bed and collapsed onto it with a sigh. “Maker, have I missed beds.” She sat up to look at Alistair who was just looking around absentmindedly. “So who are those people with you? The woman and the... uh...”

“He’s apparently called Sten and he’s a Qunari. He murdered an entire family and Aedan thought he would be a perfect addition to our little group.” 

Her face must have shown her shock because he laughed and nodded. “Yeah, that’s kind of how I felt. The sister saved us after some of Loghains men showed up. Claimed the Maker sent her a vision telling her to assist us. Here I thought we were full up on crazy.” 

Elise laughed lightly and shrugged, rubbing her palms on her pants. “The Maker works in mysterious ways I suppose.” She sighed and stared at the floor before returning her gaze to her fellow Warden. “Do you... want to talk about Duncan? It’s okay if you don’t, but it could help. Talking about him I mean.” Alistair froze for a moment before finally sitting on a chair, as well as he could in his armor.

“I’m sorry,” he murmured as he rubbed his face. “I should be handling this better. He warned me this could happen from the beginning. Any of us could have died in that battle, _you_ almost did. But I shouldn’t have lost it.”

She sighed and moved to crouch in front of him, taking his metal-clad hands into hers and staring at him. “Alistair, you just lost someone who you looked up to. It is completely reasonable to lose your mind from time to time. Don’t let anyone tell you differently, including Morrigan.” That got a laugh out of him and she stood up, walking back to the bed.

“That woman is impossible.”

“That she maybe but I think I’m going to ask her to teach me some of her spells.”

“Oh you want to be impossible too,” he asked with a smirk. Elise rolled her eyes and smiled, not giving him the satisfaction of an answer. “You’re delaying our talk.”

Alistair huffed and nodded. “Well, I’d like to have a funeral for him. Af-After all this is over. I don’t know if he had any surviving family, or any family. He said he was from Highever, or lived there.”

She thought for a moment then nodded with a smile. “Isn’t Aedan from there? I’m sure he would be more than happy to help with that. You were probably as close to family to him as any blood family.” He smiled wistfully and nodded. “Yeah, you’re right. I just can’t help but feel.. I should have been down there with him. I feel like I abandoned him, you know?”

“If he hadn’t sent us to that tower,” Elise countered, “we would be just as dead. He saved our lives by sending there.” She sighed and laid back on the bed, her hands folded over her stomach. “Ferelden would be doomed to fall to the Blight. It’s good we are still alive Alistair. They need us.”

Alistair nodded and tilted his head curiously at her. “What about you? Have you ever lost anyone close to you?” She frowned and thought for a moment. She didn’t really have any memories of losing anyone. No memories of her mother though, and very faint ones of her father. “Not... that I remember. I don’t remember my mother, at all, so maybe she died? My father was still alive when I was brought to the Circle but who knows if he still is now. All I had was the Circle.”

“I... suppose that makes sense. How did you get so good at... this then?”

“This?” She turned to look at him with a puzzled gaze.

“This... The uh... talking thing? You talk as if you know the feeling?” 

She smiled at him, only a little sad, and put her hands behind her head. “I wasn’t the first to be brought to the Circle as a young child and I knew I wouldn’t be the last. I didn’t have many friends, so when the little ones would come in, I tried my best to make them comfortable. Held them when they cried for their parents, encouraged them to make friends.” Her smile faltered some and a slow exhale slipped. “I read every book I could on the mind. I wanted to help people, make them feel better. More comforted.”

She heard metal creak across the room and heard as Alistair moved across the room. “Well thank you. Seems being a book nerd worked for you. It was really good to talk about it, at least a little bit.” His smile seemed genuine and she couldn’t help but smile back. “You’re welcome.”

A commotion sounded outside the door, Alistair reached for his sword and Elise sat up. He reached for the door and opened it, revealing a blood-covered Aedan in mid-knock, his brown hair spilling from its ponytail. He smiled and tossed two bags of coin into the room. She looked between the spilled bags and Aedan with a raised eyebrow, the man shrugging. “The Chantry board paid well. Leliana offered to let you room with her, Alistair and I have the room down the hall. Supper will be brought up here, as well as water to draw a bath.” 

Oh Maker, a _bath._ She forced her excitement to stay down as she nodded. A chance to get clean, to feel new. “What of Morrigan?” Won’t she need somewhere to sleep?”

“She said not to worry about her,” Aedan said nonchalantly. Elise nodded and slid off the bed, grabbing up the coin bag, and headed out of the room. Knight bounced around, attempting to get Sage to join in his hyper antics. A sharp whistle and he came bounding over to Elises side, tongue lolling to the side. 

They left the tavern, the innkeeper complaining about the mabari making a mess, and headed towards the merchant she dealt with earlier. _Maker help me_ , she whispered. The man narrowed his eyes at her and crossed his arms. “You aren’t getting a discount. Normal prices for you.”

“That’s fine,” she replied coolly. “I was just wondering if you had any vellum.” She needed lyrium potions but the man was already cross with her. She would wait until they came across a less angry merchant. The man nodded gruffly and pulled out two rolls, four silver a piece. She carefully counted out the required silver, handed them over, took the two rolls, and returned to the inn. 

Knight followed her quietly now, the innkeeper watching them warily as she walked to the bathing room. The bath had been filled while she was gone, though it was a bit chilled. A quick dip of her hand warmed it though and she quickly undressed and slid in with a sigh. She wasted no time cleaning the dirt from her body and hair. Then she sat and just relaxed. Her gaze wandered over her body, remarking in the subtle changes since leaving the Circle. Her belly was drawn tighter, her legs looking more muscley. Her hand tracked over the puckered scars on her stomach and chest, still red and angry looking. Flemeths magic had saved her, she should not be alive. She sat a little longer before finally getting up, drying off and slipping on the white tunic left for her.

As she walked to her room, Elise ran her hands through her hair, attempting to brush out the knots that would be forming, no doubt. When she pushed open the door to the room that she was sharing, her meal was waiting. Her stomach growled and she tore into it, the stew tasting infinitely better than anything that was made on the road. Tomorrow they would leave for Redcliffe, get help from the Arl that Alistair swore would help them, and start to garner the support the treaties would bring.

~~~

_Cullen_

_I’m alive. Teyrn Loghain abandoned the King and Wardens to die at Ostagar. By a miracle, Alistair, Aedan, and I were rescued by the Witch of the Wilds. We are the only three Wardens left in Ferelden and we must gather support against the oncoming darkspawn hordes. I will be returning to the Circle to recruit the mages and templars. I hope to see you within their ranks._

_Burn this letter once you receive it. Loghain already knows we survived the battle but doesn’t know our plans as of yet. If he were to capture us, we will surely be executed._

_I hope you are well. I miss you._

_Elise_


End file.
